Fun With ROMs Vol. I

Here are a couple of old NES games I've recently downloaded to relive the old days.

Anyone remember "Rollergames?" Here's a game I used to have and played a lot back around the 8th grade. I remember beating this after school one afternoon with my friend, Nate. It seemed pretty epic at the time.

It begins as a lot of these games based on violent organized sports did - with stale announcers catching you up to speed on the action. In this case, it looks like they've hired Charlie Watts and Jonathan Frakes. I've always said those two should team up.

Now it's time to select your team. If you select "Hot Flash," you get to play as a girl. "Rockers" are my favorite. They're all long-haired punks. By the way, who thinks the hostess is hot? Me, no, I don't think so. But I can, like, see where some people might think so and stuff.

Is this supposed to be a threat? Not very intimidating coming from someone's grandma. "Bad Attitude?" Hey, I guess the first step is admitting it.

This is what happens if you select the "T-Birds." You have to play as this tubby looser. He's slower and can't jump very far.

As fun is "Rollergames" can be, sometimes you need something a little more "adult oriented." This is where "Ring King" comes in.

Every fighter in this game looks exactly alike. The only differences are in their skin and hair colors. You can be the white guy with the red afro or the brown guy with the green afro. There's many more variations on this basic theme. As for the game, it starts off innocently enough - as boxing games go, anyway. In Japan, this game was called "Family Boxing."

But then you get to this scene. This in in between rounds when you go to your corner to receive oral sex from your twin midget trainer. Maybe this kind of stuff flies in Japan, but in the U.S., midget fellatio is generally frowned upon - in most family circles, anyway.

Stay tuned for another fun-filled edition of "Fun With ROMs!"